Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Curious About Swingers

Exactly why would anyone want to share their lover with another person? I've asked a few people this question and have received different answers. Some women do it because they are bisexual and it's a way for them to stay in a heterosexual relationship but still have lesbian experiences. Some people say it is for the opportunity to have more than one sexual partner in a way that doesn't threaten the trust in their relationships. Others do it for the fun of it, haha, whatever that means.

But even with all the assurances that both parties in the relationships are comfortable with being swingers, I find it completely hard to believe! I have seen it create problems. And for me it is obvious why! I just could not be comfortable watching my man trying to pick up other women (even if they are for both of us). And I don't understand why people get into committed relationships at all, if they just want to fuck other people anyway.

In relationships where I see a power imbalance, it is especially disturbing to me. One partner seems almost sexually obsessed and the other, out of love or something I will never understand, just goes along with it. That's the impression I get. And I feel sad that the person who has less power is being sucked into the vortex of his or her partners sexual indiscrepancies.

I realize that many people conduct very different relationships than the usual "monogamy" style one that I am committed to. I would LOVE if some of you could explain the swinger lifestyle to me in a way that challenges my suspicion that it's only for the twisted. How can a couple be strong and in love and be fucking other people in front of each other. Please tell me.

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